Coming Along

 

 Sorry, a bit out of focus.  This is four hours work today.  Hopefully I'll get a couple more in tonight after Logan goes to bed.

Gettin' Messy

 I started the charcoal today.  I have to get this done next week so I'm putting in a lot of time this week.  I had a good 6 hour session with only the occasional interruption from Logan.  I've set up a drawing/coloring station for him next to me.  This has been great for those moments when he just wants to be near me.  He wanders in, checks out what I'm doing then follows my lead and draws.  It's been really quite fun for us.

Anyway, I'm trying to contain all the charcoal as best I can since my studio is in my bedroom.  That's why I've laid down the piece instead of standing it up.  Applying charcoal is messy business!

I first block in my dark areas with a stick of compressed charcoal.  This board creates a super distinct pattern so I'll only use the stick on the areas where there is foliage.

 I then create my "pool" of charcoal.  Compressed charcoal is harsh and very unforgiving.  I only use it on areas I know are dark-dark.  I like to keep all the charcoal dust and marks contained to the darkest of parts.  I use this pool throughout the drawing, dipping my finger or a soft leather cloth and spreading where I need it.

I block in all general areas.  I carefully block in all the paper; reserving my "lights."  I don't like to use white charcoal.  I'd rather use the white of the paper to create a full-range of value.

I stopped here at hour 6.  I just knew I needed a break.  I have a good chunk of time tomorrow while Logan is at school to continue.  Once I capture her face again the rest will come smoothly as I tighten everything up.

I'm feeling good about having this done in time.  I always feel great after a working on something that is 2 inches away from my face then stepping back and seeing it come together. 

Dear Logan,

I promise to be better tomorrow.
I promise to be more patient.
When you jump on me I'll try to remember a day when you weren't around.
When you ask me over and over for candy I'll remember a time when you couldn't speak to me.
When you ignore me I'll try not to take it personally.
You are 3 years old.
And I am 32.
How easily I forget that.
Please forgive me when I yell louder than I mean to.
I pray you forget every mean face I give.
I am so far from perfect; I almost feel bad that you have me as a mom.
But nobody could love you as I do.
Nobody knows how to make you laugh like I can.
Nobody knows your face better than me.
For the good days and bad we're in this together.
You and me, kid.
I love you.
Oh, how I love you.

A Little Reminder

The assignment I gave my primary kids: Write down your favorite primary song.

This was found among the pile:

I may keep it forever.

Wait For It, Wait For It...

I was tempted to start the charcoal today.  I'm close.  I just really want to give it another day.  Even when I do jump into charcoal I'll start with areas other than the face.  Charcoal isn't impossible to adjust but it can be a very unforgiving medium.  You have to reserve your whites.  But even when I completely goof I have a few tricks up my sleeve.

When I was in high school I did a charcoal of my grandpa embracing my little brother.  It was finished and sitting on my easel downstairs.  Well, one of my nieces grabbed one of my charcoal sticks and drew several lines across his shirt and hands.  I couldn't completely get them out but luckily I could work with them.  If you look closely at the piece you could see random marks in his plaid shirt.  And I turned the marks on the hand into scars.

When I worked in a frame shop we learned all sorts of tricks to get marks and imperfections out of mat board.  I'm convinced framers are the trickiest bunch you could run into.  If something is damaged there are always options. 

Well, here is Ellie today.  She's looking good!  She's about ready.  Looking at the photo I took I'm thinking I need to thin her out just a touch.  She's got such chubby cheeks.  I almost get lost in them when I block in the values.  I'll tackle them tomorrow.  I hope to get into my studio early tomorrow but with this little one in my tummy I get so tired and nauseous.

And speaking of the beloved parasite, we get to hear the heartbeat on Monday!  Nathan and Logan will be with me which I'm excited about.  I'm looking forward to seeing how Logan reacts to hearing the heartbeat.  He understands not to jump or hit Mommy's tummy but I'm not sure he gets there is a baby in there.  When I was trying to explain it to him one day he thought he had a baby in his tummy too.  It was very sweet.

Getting There

Much better drawing session today.  I'm actually getting somewhere.  I ended up flipping the piece and reference upside down and drawing while squinting my eyes.  Then I just block in the shapes I see.  Tricking the brain this way really pulls me into the drawing.  Instead of drawing what my brain thinks I'm seeing I'm actually using my eyes to draw this individual person with her own individual features.  That's when I start to achieve the likeness of the person.

Now I'll let this drawing sit for the rest of the day.  This is actually so important for me to do.  When I rush this part I always have disappointed clients and will have to go back or start over.  I have to look at the drawing with fresh eyes.  I also find looking from different perspectives helps me with likeness.  As I go in and out of the room I'll check to see if something is off.  I'll turn the photo and reference sideways and upside down and let it sit; again, tricking the brain into seeing unique shapes instead of nose, eyes, lips, etc.  It's all about breaking the features down into shapes.  Another helpful trick is to look at the drawing in the mirror and check it against the reference.  This always reveals something.



Even now, looking at the photo with the two side by side I see all sorts of things I can tweak to make Ellie look more like Ellie.  After I give my eyes and brain a rest I'll be able to do tons of tweaking.  By the time I'm done I want the drawing to feel like her.

After a few days of observing/tweaking the drawing I'll start laying in charcoal.  Other than the eyes I don't do a lot of detail in pencil because the charcoal covers it right up.  I'm pretty good at manipulating charcoal and I can get pretty detailed but the eyes are just too important and detailed to leave to a hunk of charcoal.  So I pull out my charcoal pencils and get a brand new pencil eraser to help me fine tune the eyes.

Day Two

Establishing likeness.  This could take one day or several weeks.  It is so vital that I be in my right brain while I do this.  And while I was definitely more into it today I wasn't quite drawing from my right side.  I was often distracted.  I won't be able to draw again until Monday while Logan is at school.  

I look forward to 4 uninterrupted hours of drawing.

Starting Another Charcoal

I've been doing charcoals for years.  This is my 6th large portrait I've done for this client.  They are of her grand kids.  And the absolute best part is that she is a professional photographer so her references are always artistic, insightful, and brilliantly in-focus!

Since I've done so many, starting should be old hat but I've had trouble beginning this darling little girl.  This is my fourth project in a row so my little brain is tired.  Plus I've been nauseous from pregnancy.  I've just been dragging my feet a bit.  But I've got to get this beauty done before Christmas.  Meaning it must be framed by Christmas which means no later than the end of November.  Luckily I've got the frame shop on speed dial and all her info recorded so if I have to pull a few strings it can be done.

Well, in my avoidance, I decided to document each day.  I've never really done that and I thought it might motivate me.  So, Day one of Ellie.

I know it doesn't look like much has been acomplished but Nathan just made that board and he did a smashing job.  Plus I've prepped the board which meant a lot of bending over and around on my knees which made me want to puke.  But, the board and reference are prepped, station is clean, and I'm really ready to block in my drawing.

I'm really trying to set aside several hours three days a week just for art.  This has been great for me but I keep forgetting to turn off my phone!   My sister Lisa called and we chatted for about 3 quarters of an hour.  Whoops!  But it was Thanksgiving business and I'm in charge of pies this year.  We had some serious pie issues to work out.  

So, yeah, Day One, sort of a bust.  This is what not being in "The Zone" looks like.  Hopefully tomorrow I'll be more Zone-like.  So far just a pair of freaky looking eyes.  Yep, pretty sure those are wrong.  

But didn't Nathan make a good-looking board?

Portrait of Isaac

I enjoy trying new things.  I like to be in the habit of saying "yes" to projects I've never done because it always opens doors to new opportunities.

This was something new for me.  Aside from the occasional temple drawing I tend to veer from religious pieces.  I'm an observational artist; that is where I'm most comfortable and religious pieces are typically a step into illustration and storytelling.  Which, for me, means lots and lots of photos and references.  Then you have to fill in with imagination.  And while I am creative person (meaning I create things with my hands) I'm not totally a creative person.  I'm not a strong conjurer of originality.  It takes practice to soak in the pools of creativity; I'm more of a toe-dipper. 

So, this project got me out of my element a bit.  This was a commissioned piece meaning this was pretty much her vision but I enjoyed bringing it to life for her.  It's for his baptism in December which I think is really neat.

While left to my own devices I may not gravitate to religious content, I definitely wouldn't turn away another commission like this. 

And sorry about the photo.  Photographing pencil drawings is a pain.  Either the darks are insanely dark and harsh or it looks like I drew on purple paper.  Rest assured the paper is bright white and the grays are soft and gradient.

The Taylor Family

Love this family.

This is my second time shooting this crew and they are just fun to be with.  Their oldest is FULL of energy and he loves to show me everything he is interested in.  I often come away from a Taylor photo shoot with great ideas for paintings because nothing feels posed; it's all such a genuine moment being captured. 

And we try posing.  It just doesn't happen very well but it's okay.  In fact, I prefer what results.


Anyway, here are a few of my favorites.

The Max Family

I just finished editing pictures from a photo shoot I did while in DC.  This is the Max family and they were darling.  Their little girl is so full of energy!  And their little boy has the most heart warming smile.  I love to just follow kids and observe what they are up to.  For me that makes for the most interesting and telling portraits. 

Here are some of my favorites from our morning at the park.

Change. Ugh!

What to write since the great toss into the sea of change.

The end of August proved itself a very unfortunate time for our family.  Nathan found himself without a job.  I was not shocked by the news.  It's been four years of well...hard.

That was the initial toss.  It felt more like a catapult.

But the toss back was positive.  Nathan is in school full-time and has already decided on a major.  Engineering. He's doing remarkably well.  Just what the doctor ordered to lick the wounds of an abusive situation.  And he quickly found another lab job to pay the bills.  All is set with him.  There is focus and drive in his eyes everyday and I'm grateful.

Even I was getting into it.  I have been planning on going back into teaching for the past 6 months.  Gathering ideas and simply getting excited to work again.  Now was my time.  I was ready to jump and get this family back on its feet.  Then...another toss.  Pregnant.  And so happy about it.

But we're still out to sea with so much unknown and no land in sight.

That's been the latest.  The waters have steadied and I'm getting used to the movement but I just can't seem to get a plan to work.

I keep grasping for a solution; keep trying to connect the here and now to our future plans and goals.  Like how to survive the next 4 years while Nathan is in school.  Luckily I've had a load of art commissions but it is so hit and miss.

But through all of this I feel so cared for, so totally remembered.  I can feel the growing pains and know that I'm exactly where I need to be.  I know we will look back on this time with reverence.  Just as the disciples witnessed Christ stilling the waters at their most frightened hour we will see the power of God in our own battle for ground.

It is my goal that in 6 years I can, with sincere love, bring Nathan's former boss a pie and genuinely thank him and forgive him.  Then I will kiss my darling husband and children, wipe my hands, and call it done.  No bitterness, no more heaviness.  Just gratitude and love.  That is what I want most.

in a nutshell

I'm a lost cause when it comes to consistently blogging.  So here's a very brief photographic summary of our summer.

Lots of trips to Hogle Zoo to see the "Dino-roars."

 

A few hiking trails.  One on our 8th anniversary.

The balloon festival in Provo.

Well, that's about it.  Throw in a couple camping trips, new (to us) washer/dryer, and a broken air conditioner and you've witnessed the Kay summer 2011!